Beef Tip Tower is Back at Full Power! Fitz unveils a new segment called “Twin Tales” and we love the theme song and how much he gets whizzed on during diaper changes. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, You Tube’s “There I Ruined It” recuts Lady Gaga’s “Shallow” as a Polka, cops look for a man whole stole a 3-foot dildo, a man is arrested for robbing a store with his 10-year-old son, a new poll reveals when people most like to “do laundry”, and a man dies after wife squeezes him too hard. In the Good Stuff we hear from listeners who tell us Beef Tip Tower is back at 100% and check in from far and wide! Drew finally got his long-awaited laser flashlight, and hunted down the special battery for it, and after all that it doesn’t even set things on fire. In the Fitz Files, Kim Kardashian meets with attorneys over Kanye’s mental health and maybe also divorce, Tim McGraw has a new album coming out and he’s charging $15 to watch an online party for it, Alex Trebek reflects on his clean living as he turns 80, and Katy Perry talks about the Taylor Swift feud. All Jacked Up includes Rebecca from Parkland who steals food from the work fridge and Courtney in Tacoma who dated her boss just to get a promotion. Today’s Troop Salute is brothers Robin Williams and Nicholas Williams of the USMC. We still don’t know what will happen with school in the Fall and Fitz reads a bunch of social media messages from concerned P1 parents. Fitz’s social media has questions about doing skin-to-skin with his twins, his backyard game “Aqua Bounce”, and someone who claims to have gone through FBI training with Claire and thinks she’s lying about her identity.
Fitz has been awake for two days and wants to leave early today but Mean Old Mr. Drew says No, we have meetings and stuff. It’s National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day and we extol our favorites! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a man fires a warning shot at a store clerk in a mask fight and then has a shoot-out with police, the pandemic may be the end of McDonald’s ball pits, a principal raps about Covid-19 at school to MC Hammer’s “Can’t Touch This”, a Karen and a Ken fist fight with two guys eating outside maskless.
Drew and Claire are in perpetual pain from moving all weekend but Fitz cheers us up with an unexpected Dad Joke about Christopher Columbus! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a wedding video goes viral when the Bride and the Groom’s Mom get into a shouting match, a man who lost his “unit”…